Man of mystery

Like Austin Powers, Carl can be somewhat of a man of mystery.  Unlike Austin Powers, outside appearances would suggest that he is a very serious, reserved, somewhat shy guy.  Those who know him well know that he is anything but politically correct, passionate about his beliefs, and loves a good pun almost as much as a good glass of wine or spicy food.  However, few know what a romantic guy Carl is.  I risk completely embarrassing him here so I will try not to be too sappy, but sometimes things just need to be said.

The process of transitioning from fellowship to finding a "real job" has been a bit rough for me.  Carl started preparing me for the very real possibility of needing to move about a year ago.  Despite his best efforts to help me see reality, I resisted truly considering the possibility of moving.  That is, until this fall.  As I watched job boards for pathologists, I realized that no options were coming up in St. Louis.  Moving to another state and having our children say that they are from [insert city other than St. Louis here] hit me like a ton of bricks.  Once I worked through the grieving process, I embraced our altered future.  (However, I was still having difficulty thinking of my children being natives of Louisville (no offense to the very good people of that town).) 

Just as I was actively considering real estate agents and researching future neighborhoods/schools, Carl came to me and said that we needed to talk.  This was last Wednesday night, the night before my online class went live, and I was busily putting final touches on the class.  Carl asked me if I would want to know if he had received an offer.  Naturally, I said, "Of course!"  He then handed me a box and said the offer was in there.  This was extremely confusing to me because I thought that I knew the options on the table, and I wouldn't consider any of them exactly a "gift".  When I opened the box, I saw an offer and included with it, a map of the office's location - St. Louis.  It was hard to wrap my mind around this since I had no knowledge of a job possibility here, much less him interviewing and receiving an offer.  Turns out, Carl had been contacted by a private practice in St. Louis just before Christmas and had interviewed there and received an offer, all without my knowledge.  Carl knew that I had just come to terms with moving and did not want to get my hopes up if nothing became of this possibility in St. Louis.  That night when he showed me the offer, in an instant, our entire future as a family changed, as did the future relationships with our friends and family close to us.  I am still having difficulty believing this is real.

Carl has done many romantic things throughout our years together.  Although the flowers, candy and jewelry from our first years together were very sweet notions, it is the real everyday stuff from our later years together that I find to be the most incredibly romantic.  Through this medical school/graduate school, residency, and fellowship process, Carl has always sacrificed more so that we did not feel the constraints of our financial situation as much.  He always steps up to take care of problems, big and small, so that we don't have to worry or go through the hassle.  Real romance is taking all 3 kids to the grocery store at the end of a busy, stressful workday in order to give me a break.  It is the cup of tea that shows up next to me at night, without a word.  It is the constant care, concern, love and support that he shows every day.  Of all the many ways he shows his love, I'm not sure anything (aside, of course, from our three beautiful children) can top the gift that he gave to me this week.  As Carl said, "I never gave up on St. Louis".  And that is just Carl's way.  Silently working, saving me from details that may cause distress, and being the husband that I surely do not deserve.  I could not be more proud of you, Carl.  We have come so far together, and you have made my every dream come true.